I am in class and supposed to be paying attention, but alas, I am not. By Friday, I am so saturated with information and have given so much rapt attention, that I cannot even pretend to be a good student.
This weekend is my Spiritual Formation retreat in Chapel Hill. Apparently, the whole retreat is supposed to be silent: no cell phones, no computers, no Ipods, no schoolwork, no talking. I can deal (obviously) with the no schoolwork and technology rules, but I think it will be quite difficult to refrain from speaking. I know that the point is to silence our selves and the world and to focus wholly on God. I know that I need this. It’s just that there are really only two things that can result from that kind of silence; either you rest or you wrestle. I crave rest. I want to rest in God’s goodness and blessing and attempt to calm my soul in the midst of this busy new life. What I fear is that God will take this time to reveal something in me or to me. It’s not that I don’t want to listen to God and to know His heart; I would just really like to rest. Perhaps this is selfish. I just feel as if this has been a season of revelation, and I need some processing time.
Travis began his new job this week at the North Carolina Center for Death Penalty Litigation. It’s quite random that this job just fell into his lap. But then again, was it really random? I mean, what a unique experience. I have to say, I’m a little jealous. Here I am, going to school to eventually work at a place like that, and Travis already is. I am excited to hear the stories that he will come home with and to be challenged by this process and how God’s justice is working.
Well, it’s come to that time again; I want more tattoos! Well, I at least want to add something to the heart on my right forearm. I got the outline with the intention that I would add something soon after, but that was a year and a half ago and it remains just an outline. Ideally, I would love to add text in or around it, but I don’t know if it will work because it’s pretty small.
I also feel like I am in the mood for all new clothes. I don’t feel particularly attached to any of the things I own. Of course, that requires money, which I don’t have. So I want to buy pieces slowly. I am torn between my various tastes and styles. Some days I feel like dressing classically, RL oxford or polo, nice jeans or khakis, you know, J. Crew and such. Other days I love the trendy look: drapey shirts and chunky jewelry and loud patterns. Basically, I don’t know what to invest in. I was watching the Today show this morning and they had a segment on the particular pieces that every woman should shell out the big bucks for bc they never go out of style. They chose a nice brown leather bag, a tailored blazer, fitted designer jeans, a classy cardigan and charcoal gray trousers. I loved all the pieces they chose, so I think I’m going to take their advice. Several of the things were from J. Crew and Banana Republic, two of my favorites. Bahhhh, I'm such a girl.
Got to go pretend to pay attention.